my partner should have been here – on this side
my three best friends on the other side
it should have been the midwife-who-did-what-I-said
not the one who said
“all that matters is that you and your baby are healthy”
from 4cm it should all have been over in 3 hours
I’d prepared a selection of Chopin for the first hour
a selection of Berlioz for the next hour
and Eminem for the final hour
– to cover my swearing
it should never have been One Direction and Limp Biscuit
it should have been in a birthing pool
it should have been videoed
it should never have been a caesarian
it should have been in the garden, in the yurt
it should have been two weeks ago
it should have been two weeks later
it should have been drug-free
I should have had an epidural
it wasn’t supposed to be twins
it was supposed to be a girl
I was supposed to be able to breastfeed him
– for at least 6 years
© Char March
www.charmarch.co.uk