The spider silk of my love failed me today.
Dangled taut over breakfast table chaos
Daring acrobatics and impossible feats then
I lie broken-legged upside down
Amidst spoons and milk and a fraying school run.
I snipped and snarled and lashed out
with vicious jaws and wicked words; You
were a victim of my venom, No match
for my untamed temper and charmless aggression
I wanted to taste blood today.
You covered your fear with spikes and screams
made my fury rise, I want you to
fester and decay in my web of hurts.
Post school, my shoulders are a throb of tension
as I try again to reclaim my love for you
but out of my lips comes only hate and mean.
Asleep, your eyelashes beg forgiveness
and my howl of regret wakens the moon.
I’m a hateful Bad Mother, new species of worst
uncurling much later, my poison drips across
the page, accusing, alleging, confessing the truth.
Tomorrow I will make my web out of guilt.
Some days it’s stronger than my love.
Some days it’s all that I have.